Resilience in Parenthood

Hi there! Happy new year to all. This is the first newsletter of the year and I hope 2024 brings us all great things. One important lesson I learned in 2023 is about resilience, and I want to carry that into 2024. I gained this resilience through a unique parenting experience, and I would like to share more about that with you, but first..

Weekly Inventory Check

We often discuss in our roundtable that being agile doesn’t involve setting big goals or detailed plans. Unlike the waterfall project management style, agile is about adapting as you go. When creating the roundtable, I initially went against agile principles by trying to define specific goals for participants. Agile does not have a fixed endpoint; it is about figuring things out as you progress. There is a general direction, but you adapt along the way. For instance, if your goal for 2024 is to lose weight or become more financially stable, don’t plan out exactly how many pounds to lose or how much money to save each month. Instead, focus on the broader goal. Ask yourself, “What can I do today to move closer to that goal?” It’s about taking small steps without a rigid plan. Maybe today you decide to eat a bit less, take a longer walk, or cook at home instead of ordering out.

Think of your goal as a “north star” guiding you. Each day, ask yourself what you can do to get one step closer to your goal. Keep doing this regularly, and by the end of 2024, you may find you have achieved your goal without the need for detailed planning. That is the essence of being agile.

Resilience in Parenthood

Last week, my wife and her mom went to see a new Shahrukh Khan movie, leaving me alone with our daughter. Now, I don’t want to be the dad who says, “I didn’t know what to do,” but honestly, it was really tough. Our daughter usually goes to bed by 8:00 PM, and her bedtime routine starts at 7:00 PM. However, she doesn’t sleep well, so we’re working on sleep training her.

On that particular night, my wife took the secret weapon (breast milk) with her, and without it, getting our daughter to sleep became quite a challenge. I tried putting her down in her bed, but every time I did, her hand would fall, and she’d wake up crying. So, from 8:30 PM onwards, I ended up holding her in my arms for four hours straight. I could not do anything for more than 15-20 minutes because she would not let me sit and I had to constantly walk around with her. I attempted to enjoy some games or videos while holding her on the couch, but every 15 minutes, she would start screaming, and I had to get up again. This went on until 11:30 PM.

At this point, I realized I needed to treat the situation like a puzzle. I experimented and found that tilting her body while putting her down prevented her arm from falling, and it worked! She finally slept in her bed with my hand behind her neck. However, when I tried to slip my hand out, she woke up with big puppy dog eyes. It was a tense moment, but she miraculously closed her eyes again, allowing me to slip my hand out successfully. The triumph was short-lived because ten minutes later, she woke up again, and I had to repeat the process until 12:30 AM when her mom returned and gave her breast milk, putting her to sleep for the night.

Think about this parenting experience and relate it to your work or personal struggles. It’s like trying to settle a restless baby – no matter what, they keep waking up, right? But the key point here is that success often means sticking to your path, just enduring and not giving up. Just staying in the game long enough sometimes means that you’ve achieved it. And that’s what happened to me with my baby. I could have given up and let her stay up for a few hours which would ruin our night and the next day. But I just stayed in the game by trying to keep holding her, to see if I could manage to put her to sleep in my arms. Then from there, her mom helped me in closing down the deal. And that’s what I want to leave you with. Staying the course, just surviving sometimes, is all you need.

Want More?

This article talks about how kids learn a lot from watching what their parent do, not just what they say. So, the way parents handle tough situations influences how they handle challenges too. It’s important to notice how they face difficulties and strive to be a strong and resilient parent.

This article gives tips on how to concentrate on your family’s strengths and strengthen your ability to overcome challenges during tough times, which also helps boosting your resilience.

This article talks about the importance of developing resilience in your child. It’s crucial because it helps children overcome life’s challenges, and with the right support, they can develop this skill as they grow up.

Reel of the Week

Check out our reel of the week. Having a supportive and involved father figure can play a significant role in shaping lives. Their guidance and presence can provide valuable insights, support, and a sense of security as we navigate through various challenges and decisions. It’s a crucial relationship that can contribute to personal growth and development. The legacy a father leaves is one of love, resilience, and the belief that, with his guidance, we can become the architects of our own fulfilling and purposeful lives.

Instagram post by @thisisvasl

The Weekly Vasl Podcast

Our Episode on How to counter inflation in the face of rising prices? is out now! You can watch it below! On this inaugural Friday of 2024, I delved into a captivating podcast with Petar, a seasoned financial freedom advisor in the same locale as myself. Petar shed light on the paramount importance of maintaining cash buffers, serving as a safety net in unforeseen job loss scenarios. We discussed the pervasive impact of inflation, emphasizing the necessity of converting money into assets, such as stocks, to counteract its erosive effects. Don’t miss this insightful discussion, essential for those committed to their New Year’s resolution of budgeting and financial prudence.

We are also on Spotify, Apple, Google, and wherever you listen!

The Round Table

We are kicking off The Round Table this month with a set of individuals eager to enhance their interviewing and communication skills for better job prospects. I’ll share updates on its progress soon—I’m genuinely thrilled about this initiative! The next session begins in March 2024. If you’re keen, feel free to join by signing up through this link.

Thoughts to Leave You With

Life is meant to be tough, not easy. Even though social media often portrays things as effortless, the reality is that most of life requires effort. You have to do things like clean your kitchen, cook your meals, exercise, save money, work, and even do tasks that may not be exciting. These everyday activities make up a significant part of life, and being resilient is crucial.

It’s funny how parenting teaches us so much about life because a big part of life involves taking care of others. Even if you are not a parent or don’t plan to be one, experiencing challenges similar to parenting can be valuable. Dealing with difficult circumstances helps you learn and grow. Not everyone’s experiences are the same, some people have it easier than others. But facing tough situations can build resilience, which is like developing a mental muscle. I am not hoping for you to go through major hardships, but I do wish that you strengthen your ability to face challenges with a positive mindset.